The joy of everyday things

People often look for jubilation in big successes. These successes can include anything from a job change to buying a car. We strive for these achievements. But we often neglect the small successes. The miniscule things we achieve that go unnoticed.

The result of everything you do depends on one thing only; YOUR CONFIDENCE. Where does this confidence come from, some of us talk ourselves through it,” yes you can do it”, some of us consult our friends, some of us pessimists say, “I’m not gonna make it”. You don’t need to go anywhere for confidence. Everything you ever wanted is right in front of you, all you need to do, is look.

A fat guy, who doesn’t exercise, goes to the gym and puts in 10 pushups; that is achievement. If he tells his pushup story to his friends, they’ll ridicule him, because that is his achievement, not theirs. The point to be understood here is, look for the things that you can do, that you could not do some time ago. It may be a very very small thing for someone else, but it matters to you. It is something you could not achieve; it is something you never ever thought you would do. But today, it is something that you have accomplished. People make the mistake of comparing their lives with others. They don’t look at their 10 pushups; they writhe in the melancholy of their friend’s achievement of 20.

I still remember the time, when I was out of shape, my stamina sucked and I could barely do 10 pushups. It was not more than 1 and half years ago. If anyone would have told me then, dude in 1.5 years, you’d be in the best shape of your life, you’d have the stamina to trek better than your friends, you’d be able to do 70,80 pushups, I’d have laughed. I wanna be honest with you guys; I could never ever even imagine me being physically active and fit. I remember the day when I started going to the gym, it was the 4th of August, 2007. I remember the moment I listed an entry in the attendance book. That was the first day and I haven’t looked back since. Today when I start my exercise and do those pushups I could never do, I get an immense joy that yes, I can do it. I can do what I never could. Today when I take bath with cold water, I know this is something I could never think of doing. It is a very stupid thing to brag about your cold water bath, but it is not something to brag about, it is something to feel happy about.

After reading this post, think to yourself, today, did you do something that you were not able to do before? If the answer is yes, smile to yourself, be happy, because u have achieved a feat. Don’t think about how small a thing it is for anyone else, it matters to you, and that is important. If the answer is no, do something tomorrow so that the answer will be yes. Confidence is not something you tell yourself; it is something you get, by being yourself and doing things yourself.

Remember, you are the protagonist of your own movie; the others are just the audience. Make the movie such that others watch in awe for the extravagant work of art you are making.

The thoughtless approach to life

Guys, its 2.46 in the night, and I guess I am too excited to sleep. Why you ask, well I’ve just had a drastic change of perspective. Many of you might be wondering, what an odd title for today’s post, “The thoughtless approach to life”, what the hell does that mean? It means, acting the way your heart says, it means acting without the brain coming into the picture, in other words, THOUGHTLESS.

There’s an old cliché that goes, “Do what your heart says”. I agree, at times this does act out to be a better approach, especially when you depend on your ‘gut instinct’. However, I must say, I disagree with ‘going with the heart approach’. There are many situations in life, wherein, going with your heart, will make you feel like a jerk. These situations are the ones in which you get angry, your heart tells you to lambaste the person you are angry on, your brain doesn’t tell you anything because you are too angry for it to comprehend what you are doing, and you go ahead and berate the person. In any other saintly blog, people would tell you, think of how it makes the other person feel, thing of his/her feelings, you hurt the person you care for, blah, blah, blah. That’s all a bunch of BS. Think of what YOU get after that. Let the person you roughed up (not literally) will think about him. Think about you, you’ll get a totally tempestuous demeanor.

Let us take a simple example which will make this lucid. A typical scenario of a boy and a girl, they are not engaged, but there could be something cooking there. The two plan a date, at the last moment, the girl cancels it because there is another friend of hers who has some problem and she has no alternative but to help him (common he’s a friend too). A typical example in which the both, the girl and the boy are right at their positions but the boy is super pissed off coz he feels he was ditched. Let’s say, you are the boy, there are three approaches you can take to handle this situation:

Approach I:
You don’t call the girl coz you are angry and wait for her to call you. (There’s good chance that she might not call you for a couple of days), this will stoke your anger and you’ll feel more pissed off. Ultimately there’s a dialog, and you give her a piece of your mind in all vehemence.

Repercussions: You are more pissed off, coz now, not only are you angry, you’ve lost that chance for a date, or at least delayed it.

Approach II:
If you are like me and can’t sit tight until you’ve taken your revenge, you’ll gush out your anger on the girl.

Repercussions: The girl is afraid of you as you are now whimsical in her opinion and areunpredictable. She stops telling you the truth about things coz she doesn’t know how you’ll react. You are obviously still pissed off. Also, similar to the earlier approach, you’ve lost that chance for a date, or at least delayed it.

In both these approaches, you are losing out. You are still angry, the girl thinks you are crazy and your chances of the date have slimed. Now comes the third approach:

Approach III:
Talk to the girl, very gently. Conjure up some dialog which will make her feel important (remember we are using our brain here). Explain to her that you are going through all this trouble to make her understand and blah blah, you get the hint.
Result: The girl feels you are a very mature person (you know you are not ;)), she respects you more, you are closer to her, you’ll surely go on a date now, next time, her other friend might get the second priority since you care about her so much.

The example is just to make you guys understand but the bottom line is, think about how your approach benefits you. Ultimately, being angry is justified but you have to make the best out of the situation for yourself. And that comes only when you stop thoughtless approach to life. All of us are cerebral; we just have to make use of our wits.

Cheers,
Swapnesh